3 Reasons Why I Always Drink The Airplane Coffee

a cup of coffee and a waffle on a table

Flying is such a luxury. Being whisked from Point A to Point B at over 500 miles per hour never ceases to amaze me. Enjoying a window seat view from 39,000 feet is a piece of heaven on earth. But it’s even better with a delectable cup of coffee in hand. Here’s why airplane coffee is my only choice when flying.

It Keeps the Immune System Strong

If there is one thing in flight coffee is known for, it is for it’s immune-boosting properties. All the studies show this. It’s bound to be contaminated with E. coli, which means if it doesn’t kill you, it just makes you stronger.

Given the number of cups I’ve had without dying, by now I ought to be unstoppable. Maybe it’ll even help me live longer.

It Doesn’t Dull the Senses

You might think that a gin and tonic is a far better in-flight beverage. Don’t fall for it. When you’re jetting along at five miles above the ground, you want to savor every moment. Every. Moment. Being stuck in a metal tube with 242 other people is an experience like no other. Pounding down a couple alcoholic drinks and passing out is just wrong. Instead, bring on that caffeine. And then two more cups.

Enjoy talking with your introverted seatmate. Walk barefoot up and down the aisle. Take in the lavatory smells. And above all, clap when you land. It’s the best way to celebrate the wonder of flight.

It’s A Great Reminder

I enjoy every cup of in-flight coffee. The dominant flavor profile is usually either acrid burnt beans or watered-down dirt. Bad? No. Utterly perfect. It reminds me of how good I have it. It’s not everyday you can enjoy a cup of joe up in the sky! You’re flying for goodness sake. Be thankful life is so excellent.

Airplane Coffee. Always.

Drink in the airplane coffee. It’ll make you high on life.

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ChuckMO

I don’t like the taste of coffee candy, much less the liquid form. If I’m trying to wake up in the morning I find planting my bare butt on a cold toilet seat usually does the trick.

Christian

A Modest Proposal indeed. Thanks for the laugh.

Patrick

Excellent comedy! Sadly, when I’m up in the sky, I’m lulled into believing at least half of it.

Mike

My suggestion is to load up in the lounge (decent lounges have a barista) before boarding. Coffee on board in my experience could kill a brown dog, but as you all know most Aussies are coffee snobs. Agree Alcohol as discussed not a great idea but a wine with your meal is one of life’s true pleasures.

Last edited 4 days ago by Mike
Emcampbe

You forgot to add – lack of sugar.

Sure, you can add the requisite amount if you want, but aside from water – all the other drinks on a plane are full of sugar. A can of soda has more added sugar than recommended for an entire day (don’t get me started on the Starbucks drinks that are sweetened that much, as well) and fruit juice isn’t much better, if at all.

No, not the best cup of coffee you are going to drink, but I get it too.

Derek

If it doesn’t kill you, it makes you stronger???

Then drink a little cyanide??? NO!
Then cut off a leg??? NO!
Then have a high fat diet and get erectile dysfunction??? NO!

Gravelly Point Guy

Man you’re weird!!

Jason

You know, its for the reasons stated in various articles concerned about the health of the water on planes that I make sure to clean all the pipes, faucets, and even the hot water tank at my house at least 4 or 5 times a year. You can never be too careful! I’ve had a little bit of trouble accessing the incoming waterline from the city to properly clean it. Something about “Do you have a permit?” and “You can’t do that! Its city side of the meter!” Do they not understand that the inside of the pipes is going… Read more »

Gene

Don’t fool yourself into thinking you are immune to E. Coli. I won’t ever drink a cup of anything made with airplane heated tank water.

Christian

And they say satire is dead.

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